Текст песни Lampoon National - Deteriorata

You are a fluke
Of the universe
You have no right to be here
Deteriorata! Deteriorata!

Go placidly
Amid the noise and waste
And remember what comfort there may be
In owning a piece thereof

Avoid quiet and passive persons
Unless you are in need of sleep

Ro-tate your tires

Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself
And heed well their advice,
Even though they be turkeys

Know what to kiss and when!

Consider that two wrongs never make a right
But that THREE do

Wherever possible, put people on hold

Be comforted that in the face of all aridity and disillusionment
And despite the changing fortunes of time,
There is always a big future in computer main-te-nance

Chorus

You are a fluke
Of the universe
You have no right to be here
And whether you can hear it or not
The universe is laughing behind your back

Remember the Pueblo

Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle and mu-ti-late

Know yourself
If you need help, call the FBI

Exercise caution in your daily affairs,
Especially with those persons closest to you
That lemon on your left, for instance

Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls
Would scarcely get your feet wet

Fall not in love therefore;
It will stick to your face

Gracefully surrender the things of youth:
The birds, clean air, tuna, Taiwan
And let not the sands of time
Get in your lunch

Hire people with hooks

For a good time call 606-4311;
Ask for "Ken"

Take heart amid the deepening gloom
That your dog is finally getting enough cheese

And reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot
It could only be worse in Milwaukee

Chorus

You are a fluke
Of the universe
You have no right to be here
And whether you can hear it or not
The universe is laughing behind your back

Therefore, make peace with your god
Whatever you conceive him to be
Hairy thunderer, or cosmic muffin

With all it's hopes, dreams, promises and urban renewal
The world continues to deteriorate

GIVE UP!

Reprise

You are a fluke
Of the universe
You have no right to be here
And whether you can hear it or not
The universe is laughing behind your back